


Trump x Cruz: Now With 300% More Careless Whisper

by microwaveslayer



Category: Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: Blowjobs, Careless whisper, Hillary Approves this message, M/M, Satire, Smut, crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-18
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-08-15 15:50:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8062384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/microwaveslayer/pseuds/microwaveslayer
Summary: After Trump calls on Putin to help make things right, Cruz feels so confused.





	

With George Michael’s rendition of Careless Whisper blasting, infamous Cheeto Daddy-kohai, Donald Trump, got on his knees, tearing off his suit (which had cost a small loan of a million dollars), consumed by lust. Before him, standing proudly erect and sparkling like the bishonen love interest, lay Vladimir Putin’s splendid dick.  
Stroking it tenderly, Trump-kun looked up, tears in his eyes like a hentai girl. “Promise to support me, White Russian Senpai?”  
Vladimir Putin blinked, as is he hadn’t noticed the Dorito-dust-organe hand on Vladimir Putin Junior. “Согласно всем известным законам авиации , нет никакого способа, пчела должна иметь возможность летать.”  
And, just as Trump-kohai tookVladimir Putin Junior into his mouth, Careless Whisper gave way to a Hillary Clinton ad on Spotify. Trump, whose mouth was full of Russian cock, and Vladimir Putin, who didn’t understand English, didn’t comment on the ad.  
“I’m Hillary Clinton, and I approve this message.”  
As the ad ended, the first lyrics of Allstar came on.  
“Some-BODY ONCE TOLD ME”  
And, to everyone’s surpsise (minus Vladimir Putin as nothing surprises him), the door burst open!  
“How could you, Trump-kun?” Ted Cruz asked, eyes also full of tears.  
Trump only pulled away from Vladimir Putin’s splendid dick to answer. “Because, Cruz-chan. Putin-senpai told me he could have that baka Hillary hacked and make America great again.”  
“B-b-b-b-b-but,” Cruz-chan stuttered. “I thought we would make America gr8 again? How could you, Putin-sama?”  
Vladimir Putin blinked, then opened his mouth to say, “Его крылья слишком малы, чтобы получить его жир маленькое тело от земли.”  
“You’re both bakas!” Cruz-chan cried, sinking to his knees. He began to sob, tears literally just running everywhere, like when anime girls cry like fountains. His tears ended up on a business card printed on an onion layer.  
From the heavens, Shrek descended in a perfect T-pose. Shrek put a huge green hand on Cruz-chan’s shoulder, making Cruz-chan’s cry slow to a shojo sniffle.  
“It’s all ogre now,” Shrek says, grinning. He puts Cruz-chan over his shoulder, carrying him off to his swamp.  
Donald Trump blinked, then turned back to Vladimir Putin Junior, only to find Vladimir Putin had gotten dressed again. As Vladimir Putin got up to leave, Trump-kohai threw his soft, orange body at Putin’s ankles.   
“Will I ever see you again?” Trump-kun asked, looking up with sparkles in his eyes.  
Vladimir Putin looked down, then shrugged. “Пчела, конечно, летит все равно, потому что пчелы не волнует, что люди думают, невозможно.”


End file.
